Caron Andregg

A girl ripe with wanting 
Unfolds herself before you 
Like a gift; the delicious
Surprise of unfamiliar skin
Startled by desire
Awake after long sleeping
Nimble fingers search 
for the spots which unlock her
Tentatively touching
Like Asian Macaques
High in the Japanese alps
Who discover a hidden pool
Springfed and bubbling
Amidst the snow
Reach for the warmth 
Then shy and run away
You find her not so much 
Frightening as inexplicable
As those clever mountain monkeys
Over time learn to bathe
Daily in those steaming pools
Not from some innate fastidiousness 
But because they find delight in it
So from halting exploration 
You will come in time
To touch her for sheer joy.

Time conspires to keep us two apart
Joined only at the telephone wire
Ours is a romance of voices
Electrons and empty air
Whispers in the dark.

Our voices shape our bodies
In each others minds.
My voice, grown deeper over time
Swells and curves as it descends
The watercourse from throat to thigh.

A curious, kitten-curl
At the corner of your mouth  
furs your words
And I listen hard
To hear the shape of that faint furl.

Seeing is deceiving
But we knew the path was dark
And dangerous when we took it
We went into this thing 
With our eyes closed.

They encountered each other
Publicly, at a party
Packed with clients and friends
Embraced, chastely
With a superficial brushing of the cheek
Careful to conceal themselves
Yet still betrayed
By the swirl of her dress
Which reached around his thighs
And clung to him
On her behalf.

She received him 
Open
Like a vessel
Like a hand 
Open
Giving
Like a road
Winding
A smooth, sinuous ribbon
Through the 
Parched 
Bleak 
Golden 
Landscape 
Of their day to day
All loose, blind corners
Leading anywhere
With no roadsign

Spent a week visiting old friends
Got a ride from the airport into town
Wet and cold.  Not ten minutes back 
And there's a beer in your hand
And a line on the mirror
Right off the pad and you're back in it
Jesus, were All your friends drug dealers?

The generous one sends you home with a gift
A rock like a monarch's lost jewel
She watches, aslant in the doorway
Loose-jointed while you weigh it
On a grain-scale stiff with disuse
Creamy-thighed and kittenish
As the coke-whore creeps up her legs.

It all rushes back so easily
Almost forgotten, but never quite
Just like riding a bicycle.
You start out saying you'll only snort up 
On weekends, never on school nights
Then rationalize why this once will be okay
Not too much, just a pick-me-up
A toot between dinner and drinks
You know when to say when.

She found out you did a line without her 
And hit the roof.  Suddenly you saw it all 
Unwinding, just like before; the witch-stranger 
Standing aslant in the doorway	
Of the house you put up your nose
And all that pretty weaponry
Always out, always loaded.

Better to back away now 
While you still remember how
Afraid to hustle any more blow
Now the adrenaline rush 
From the fear of '3 strikes' 
Lasts longer than the high
Besides, your connections all wear
The faces of your best friends' kids
And you can't trust anyone under 30.

So you pour yourself another single-malt 
And count the lives you have left
Put Big Brother on the CD player
Janis, digitally remastered
Sounding better than she ever did in life.